I Spent a Decade as a Public School Teacher and This Past Year with Only Homeschoolers. Here's What I Learned.

With the last day of school 2 weeks away, I've spent some time reflecting on our first school year at The Dandelion Cafe. After ten years teaching in public schools, I thought I had a solid understanding of what teenagers are like, how they learn, how they grow, and what they need. But this past year, I left the system and spent all my time with homeschooled students instead.

It’s been eye-opening.

Here are ten things that surprised me the most:

1. Bullying isn’t a normal part of growing up.

In public schools, bullying is often brushed off as a rite of passage. But after a year working exclusively with homeschoolers, I realized how peaceful a learning environment can be when that kind of social cruelty just… isn’t there. Kids still have disagreements, sure, but the toxic dynamics we see in school hallways don’t automatically appear when kids are learning outside the system.

2. Homeschooled teens know a lot more about how the world actually works.

Without being confined to standardized curricula, these teens are exposed to real-world conversations, current events, adult responsibilities, and hands-on learning. They ask thoughtful questions about money, politics, mental health, and careers, not because it’s on a test, but because they’re curious and engaged.

3. Homeschooled kids are way more mature.

Maybe it’s because they spend more time around adults or because they aren’t constantly managing the social hierarchy of a school. Either way, many homeschooled teens come across as older than their age. They’re more self-directed, more grounded, and more thoughtful in how they communicate.

4. Homeschooled kids have much stronger vocabularies and use slang way less.

It’s not that they don’t know what the slang means, they just don’t rely on it. They speak more clearly and confidently, and often seem more comfortable using precise language. Their vocabulary isn’t necessarily academic, but it is rich, varied, and expressive.

5. Homeschooled kids are better at socializing with people outside their peer group.

In schools, kids are grouped by age from morning until dismissal. In homeschooling communities, the lines are blurrier. Teens often spend time with younger children, older adults, and everyone in between. As a result, they tend to be more adaptable in conversation and more confident talking to people of all ages.

6. These teens know A LOT of interesting stuff even though they’ve never been to "school".

Whether it’s mythology, mechanics, philosophy, or fungi, homeschooled teens tend to have deep knowledge in at least one or two areas that fascinate them. Because they often have more freedom to follow their curiosity, they go down rabbit holes and come back with real insight.

7. Homeschooled teens don’t care as much about social media.

It’s not that they don’t use it at all, but they’re often less obsessed with curating an image or chasing online trends. Many of them have a healthier relationship with social media than their school-attending peers. They’re just not as plugged into the comparison game.

8. Homeschooled kids have less anxiety about public speaking or sharing their ideas.

In smaller, more supportive learning environments, kids often get comfortable sharing their thoughts. Over time, I saw shy kids blossom into confident presenters, not because they were forced, but because they were invited into conversations without the fear of harsh judgement or ridicule.

9. Homeschooled teens are less judgmental.

Without the constant social sorting that happens in traditional schools, many of these teens are more accepting of others’ quirks, ideas, and identities. They don’t see “different” as bad. They see it as normal and even interesting.

10. Homeschool teens have the same hopes, dreams, goals, and fears as every other teen.

They want to find friends. They want to be loved and understood. They wonder what they’ll do after high school. They worry about making the wrong choices. They dream big. In the end, homeschooled teens aren’t better or worse than other kids; they’re just growing up in a different environment. And it’s changing them in powerful ways.

This year has changed how I see education. I’ve learned that learning doesn’t have to be stressful or so rigid. Homeschooling isn’t perfect, but it’s full of possibilities that the traditional system rarely offers. Most importantly, I’ve come to see that kids thrive when they feel safe, heard, and free to be themselves. And that might be the most important lesson of all.